Finding Treatment for my PTSD

By Jasmine;

Hello, to my harmonious readers. Continuing with my experience after my hysterectomy, which impacted my heart, it developed tachycardia. I had to endure another stint at the hospital to repair my heart’s rhythm (please read My Traumatic Hysterectomy). Finally, after a lot of probing from my cardiologist, my heart returned to its normal pace. I thought that I could move forward and leave this hellish experience in the past. But, unfortunately, the unsettling memories of my hysterectomy stayed with me and grew in power. The memories became a sinister entity that followed me wherever I went. 

My panic attacks were reoccurring, and my anxiety was limitless. My fear suffocated and engulfed me in a blaze of despair. I became paralyzed with fear of my anxiety. My heart would pound so hard it became painful.  I was petrified that my heart would thump so hard that it would stop beating. I felt like I was dying. The anxiety was like waves of doom washing over me, each wave hitting me harder than the last. The adrenaline felt like electricity racing through my body. My fear felt heavy on my shoulders. My body was doing its own thing, and I had no way to stop it. I felt trapped and out of control, like I was in a car racing towards a cliff with no brakes or steering wheel.

Continue reading “Finding Treatment for my PTSD”

Trauma headaches and vertigo

By Rachel Ganz:

The sun sets somewhere outside the corner of my eye and my dog is staring at me waiting for me to play but I know he’ll be fine if he just finds a stick, lies down and chews.

I’ve spent seven days, almost, lying in bed, with the room spinning.

The doctor called it Vertigo. She told me “what’s strange about vertigo is that’s it’s a symptom. It’s not an actual diagnosis. It’s just a symptom, usually of another problem. Or it’s possible for you to have something called something soemthing something something

She told me to do neck exercises but only if someone else is with me when I’m home.

Continue reading “Trauma headaches and vertigo”

Dear Fresher, – reflections and advice from a recent graduate

By Megan;

Now that my three years of university have ended, I’ve found myself feeling much more emotional and nostalgic than I was expecting. Of course I knew it was going to be sad, it’s the end of an era, (and a step closer to being a fully-grown adult aaaahh!), but I’ve been hit by a wave of emotions that have really made me reflect on my last three years at the University of Kent.

In Fresher’s week I attended an induction talk for my course, I remember sitting down really nervous about what we may have to do or what we might have to discuss (the imposter syndrome was really settling in!). In this hour talk we were asked to write down some answers to a couple questions on a book we had to read over the summer. We were then told that they were going to keep our answers and return them to us at the end of our final year – kind of like a time capsule of our first literary thoughts at university. Now I’m pretty sure these answers were probably lost or thrown in the bin at some point in the last three years but I can tell you that they were never returned to me. However, it did get me thinking about what little Fresher Megan wrote and how much I have changed since then. From being a timid, first-year wondering whether I was going to make friends, do well in my degree or even if university was worth it— to now, an English and American literature graduate.

Continue reading “Dear Fresher, – reflections and advice from a recent graduate”